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My Crackhead Friend

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“Cast all of your anxiety onto Him because He cares for you” 1 Peter 5:7

If you and I became friends right now you would, at first, see my outward self. You woul see a tall, thin, blonde haired girl with a Canadian accent. Once you got to know me, you would see a VERY hard working, driven, intelligent mother who has the ability to make almost anyone laugh. I am in my late 20’s. Once you got to know me a bit better you would also see a girl who enjoys her alone time, someone who sometimes goes into depressed modes, and a person who would do ANYTHING to help others. You would probably think that I cuss a bit much and sometimes I loose my temper easily. If you are an analyzer such as myself you would see that this driven, temperamental girl has experienced a great deal of death and abuse. But let me point out that my past has only affected me to a small negative extent, I truly believe in taking our battles and turning them into lessons. Lessons in which we APPLY to life for the greater good. I have a tendency on dwelling on my past, wishing I could go back and change so many things, wishing I would have said something different, done something different.
I grew up in a very small town, its actually considered a “village”. It was predominantly white, very country, but one of those places where you had to have a thick skin to survive. I saw a lot of violence from an early age, and was introduced to drugs at an age no person should. At 15 I could look at a pill or powder and name every detail of what it is. I was an excellent student. and had a way with making my parents think I was a “good” girl. At 16 years old I was smoking crack everyday. I was what I refer to as a “functioning addict”. I held a job, and got good grades. By 19 I was a full blown prescription drug addict, taking up to 30 Norcos a day, everyday.
  • 22.6 Million people in America, starting at age 12, are addicted to illegal drugs
  • 10 Million people from the age of 12-20 are full blown alcoholics
  • Since 1980, the rise of drug abuse has risen 580%
  • 1/35 Opiate Addicts can successfully stop
  • 3-15% of Drug Addicts recover successfully
    So if 22.6 Million people are drug addicts and (we will average the 3-15%) and 10% of people successfully quit, that is over 20 Million people who will live their entire lives on drugs. And this is only in America.
    Okay, statistics aside. I am no longer living the life of a drug addict, but I do know a lot of people who do. I left that grungy “Village” and made something of myself. I’m one of the VERY few who did. If you read my older blog in which I spoke of how we pick our family, you’ll remember that I spoke of my “Aunt”. Here, we will call her Amanda. Amanda is 20 years my senior and we have quite an odd friendship. I don’t think its odd, but from the outside it looks as though. Every Christmas, I do several charities and one year she asked me on Facebook if I would help her wrap presents (she has a very bad back), and I accepted her request. As we got to chatting, we had a lot in common. The people in my life now do not understand what its like to be a recovering addict, besides the internet I don’t have anyone that I can talk to about what its like. We had such a fun time that day that we began having coffee dates in the mornings and I learned she was a recovering addict as well. She was less fortunate than me, she discovered Crack after she had her first child and did not do right by that child at all. She lives life with a MASSIVE hole of regret based on her choices. She IS clean now. Me and Amanda spent many mornings talking to each other about our drug days, what we did, what we would do to get it, the shameful amounts of money we spent, the people we knew that died, ect. Amanda is now a wonderful mother to teenage twins and a woman of God, and above all….my best friend. I have a bedroom at her house and can talk to her about ANYTHING.
    Amanda’s story is miraculous, it is a true miracle of God. When she told me how she got sober, I listened to her stone faced and had goosebumps the whole time, then we both cried. I want to share this story with you.
    Amanda was introduced to crack at the age of 32 by two of her childhood friends. This recreational habit started out as an occasional thing, but as the fates would have it, it became her way of life. She was smoking crack everyday, all day. Amanda was a very typical drug addict, she stole, she lied, she cheated, she went to dangerous areas to score crack, she lost her child, she didn’t care about anything other than her next hit. She was a crack addict for 12 years. She has sex for crack, she even watched a few people die in front of her from over dose. She got several felonies, she was incarcerated, the works.
    After about 8 years into this devilish addiction, she wanted to stop but saw no hope. She entered SEVERAL rehabs, and only came out with more “connections”. She went to NA, AA (as she became an alcoholic as well), she spent years trying with her addiction getting worse and worse. Amanda was stick thin, she was hospitalized, she almost died a few times. She was desperate. Amanda was smoking crack up to 25 times a day, crack to her was just as common as cigarettes.
    Amanda lost her child and all of her loved ones gave up on her. She was desperate. She tried it all.
    One night in the Winter as she was at home alone, after an entire day of smoking this nasty drug, not showering or leaving her home for days on end, she tried the one thing she hadn’t before, she prayed. Amanda got on her knees next to her bed and yelled out to God for help. She cried, she shook, she prayed for almost an hour asking Him to PLEASE HELP. The desperation in her voice, the tears in her eyes which were so black from the abuse she endured from dealers and terrible men flowed and for once in almost a decade Amanda felt passion. Amanda did NOT want this life anymore.
    After her long prayer, after she had no tears left, Amanda had a cigarette and went to bed.
    When she woke in the morning, Amanda carried on her usual routine. She got up, turned on the TV, made coffee, lit a cigarette….but something was different. She did not crave, smoke, nor even think of her drug. Amanda had ZERO withdrawal symptoms and NEVER EVEN ONCE craved crack again. She woke up clean. I know that this story seems incredibly impossible, but it is 100% true. Her desperate cries to the Lord worked, and He listened. After 12 years of smoking crack and drinking alcohol, she literally woke up and NEVER EVER craved either one again. And like I said, she had NO withdrawals. TALK ABOUT A MIRACLE!!!!!
    Amanda moved on to become a religious woman, now knowing that God was in fact real and he worked miracles on her. She became an advocate to other women with addiction and now, 5 years later, is proud to say that she has not touched drugs or alcohol, she has cut off her “friendships” with the drug people, and has never looked back. She is an awesome mother, a wonderful Godly woman, and my best friend.
    As untrue as this may seem, this story is the truth. There is no exaggeration at all. Most would be envious and say she is lucky to not have experienced detox, but she didn’t. God did that for her. She will always have to live with the pain she caused her eldest child, more importantly, her CHILD has to suffer with what he went through because of her, and in her family she is forever deemed a drug addict. But she went on to help others, including me. She did not spend a decade smoking crack in vain, alot of bad came from it, but now alot of good comes from it.
    But most importantly, now she has a wonderful relationship with the Lord and has passed that on to her twins and myself.
    I have heard 1 in 5,000 people can quit crack successfully, even less can quit without help. She is a miracle. God is good.
    And if you EVER need someone to talk to, send me a message, she would love to speak with you and help you as well.
    Amanda (Mom), you are MY miracle. I love you….so so much.

     

    Miracles are considered signs that God works in the Earth to convince people that he is the omnipotent ruler of the universe.

    James 5:13-16

    Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing praise. Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer of faith will save the one who is sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.

    

     
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